Well? Did you do it? Did you eat like it was your last meal? I did. I went back in for seconds, thirds, and finally blacked out having my fourth helping. I'm not sure how I got home that night. At one point, I literally burped and tasted turkey in my mouth for like two hours. Madness! Pure, delicious, turkey filled madness. And it's all thanks to the pilgrims. Wow!
And did you also Black Friday shop? Or are you more of a Cyber Monday kind of guy (or gal)? I haven't done either because I'm broke, but I'm gonna guess that you... went Black Friday shopping. See? I know you better than you know yourself. What did I do, you ask? I went to work on Black Friday. So, instead of losing money, I made some. Nice!
Are you listening to Christmas music? I've been listening to it since the beginning of November. I like to go straight from Halloween to Christmas, and then celebrate Thanksgiving, or as I call it, Christmas Lite, right in the middle. I'm an early adopter of Christmas tunes. You know what I like? The songs are short. They are short and catchy. And you can't sing them in a bad mood because the content is so ridiculous. A magical dancing snowman? A very obese man flying in a sleigh giving out free presents? A very cold, snowy night where you've tricked a woman an trapped her inside your house in order to have sex her? These are not the things that nightmares are made of. (Well, maybe that last one is. Who wrote that song, Bill Cosby? Bazinga!!) I consider any dream where there isn't a snowman, a present, and/ or a woman trapped against her will to be a bad dream. And I consider any dream where there is just a snowman to be a wet dream. Bazinga!!
Stay tuned for an update in the coming weeks. I've got big plans for December. If you want to give to charity, I take cash, checks, money orders, Venmo, Snapcash, Twitter Glitter, Facebucks, and BitCoin. Basically, anyway you get money to me, I will accept. I'll even take counterfeit money. Because if it looks like buck, smells like a buck, spends like a buck, what is it