Labor Day: My pleasure, Charlie. Nobody is at work today, anyway.
Charlie: That's because we are celebrating you.
Labor Day: (Laughs).
Charlie: Now, how did you come about?
Labor Day: Well, in 1882, two men were credited with adopting the idea of me, which nowadays wouldn't be weird at all, but back then was unheard of.
Charlie: And where did you get your start?
Labor Day: Well, in 1887, Oregon made me a holiday first, and then I was made federal in 1894, when everyone jumped on the bandwagon. Not one of the Oregon Trail's bandwagons, though.
Charlie: Ah. And so what do you stand for?
Labor Day: I celebrate the economic and social contributions of workers. And that's why people are off work and given this joyous day reflection about their jobs. Some people do this year round on unemployment, except without the joyous part.
Charlie: Yeah, I've heard of that, but I don't want to start talking politics. How should we celebrate you?
Labor Day: Well, there are lots of ways. You could rest, throw a party, play golf, shop for things on sale; I mean, the list goes on and on.
Charlie: If a store has a sale, doesn't that mean people are working?
Labor Day: No. Oh wait. Yeah. Huh, it's kind of like a Catch-22 percent off. (Laughs)
Charlie: Ha, ha. Now, I have to bring this up. Some people hate you because you mark the unofficial end to summer. What do you have to say to that?
Labor Day: Summer ends when schools start up, not because of me. Take that up with the government.
Charlie: Ok, ok, no politics. So, do you have anything else to say?
Labor Day: Um, yeah, just Happy Me and don't wear white anymore. I'm ready for football, are you? Hey, if that's work, sign me up!
Charlie: Ha, yes, well thank you again for talking with me.
Labor Day: No problem. Now get back to work.