SAT Prep for Comedians: CRITICAL READING

SAT Prep again! This week, it's critical reading. Yeah, we all know you know how to write, but can you read and comprehend? Let's find out.

1) Johnny tried to tell his Donald Trump joke as if it was _________; we all know it was really _________, though.

a) controversial -- unfunny   b) his own -- stolen   c) topical -- incorrect   d) terrible -- SNL worthy   e) existential -- grounded in reality

2) The older comedian's dick joke fell flat; However, his anti-_________ joke hit really hard.

a) women   b) black people   c) Mexicans   d) gays   e) abortion

3) A female comedian slays at a bringer show. She crushes most of her competition, including the men. They take offense to that. Even though she was arbitrarily better, she is still bullied and called mean names out of the fear and insecurity of her male counterparts.

The primary purpose of the passage with reference to the society under discussion is to:

a) show the difference between boys and girls   b) prove women are funny once and for all   c) encourage more people to go to bringer shows   d) discourage more people from going to bringer shows   e) use big words like 'arbitrarily' and 'counterparts'

The word 'counterparts' (line 4) most nearly means:

a) waiters   b) audience members   c) male comedians   d) therapists   e) Uber drivers

Alright, let's discuss: Question 1 is fairly easy. All Donald Trump jokes have been made up to this point. Every. Single. One. There are absolutely no new ones to be made. That being said, the answer is clearly (b); he stole it.

Question 2 is a little hairier. Disregard the puns thrown in to the question and the beginning of this answer. They are misdirects because I like puns. The answer is actually (e). Trust me, it's a funny joke. I won't do it justice retelling it here because you need to see the act out of walking to the grocery store. 

Question 3 is a two-parter. The first answer seems obvious: To prove once and for all that women are funny. But that's not true (Please do not write emails! I'm kidding!). The correct answer is (e) use big words like 'arbitrarily' and 'counterparts.' It shows off my innate perfect grasp of the Wnglish language. The second answer is pretty straight forward. You may be drawn to Uber  drivers as an answer because they are everywhere, but in this context, (c) male comedians makes the most sense. Come to think of it, they are everywhere too. Go figure. Comedian is like the Uber driver of people jobs, or something like that. 

Next week: Writing!