Now, I know what you're going to say. "Mr. Charlie, how are you going to make cynicism funny? This is going to be awful." Please, call me Charlie. The Mr. Is an optional prefix. Secondly, don't be so cynical. Just because spell check has corrected almost every one of my attempts to spell cinycal, doesn't mean that this post will be bad. Also, I'll try not to ramble.
Now, I'll be the first one to admit that I am cynical sometimes. I suffer from cynicism, which at first I thought was the disease that lets you hear colors. Turns out that's called synesthesia. Cynicism is when you can hear and see the darkness. It's actually become my defense mechanism for disappointment. You see, when you expect the worst, the outcome is either what you expected or better than what you expected. It's foolfproof.
Why am I telling you about this now? Well, I saw the word yesterday in a book I was reading and asked "Is this anything? Can I write about this? I don't have an idea yet for the week. Will this work?" I was expecting it to not turn out that good (Cynicism!), but so far, it's not half bad. (Foolproof!) I'm going to go with it and see what happens. Life's funny that way and so am I. I've already written stuff about pessimism, I think, so this is just the root of that idea.
Look at that. I accidentally started to ramble towards the end. Goddammit!! I can't do anything right. This is all going to Hell in a hand basket. Come on, Charlie. This isn't working. I'm sorry. I'll be back next week with more of the same. Ugh. Stupid, stupid, stupid.