I'm Not McLovin It!

To Whom it May Concern,

It has been brought to my attention by an astounding number of people (let's say 2) and an even more astounding number of people (let's say 10) that I resemble the character McLovin from the movie Superbad. I don't see it. They tell me I have his look and mannerisms. I look at myself and ask "Am I some 25 year old Hawaiian organ donor? No, I don't think so." You see, no one's McLovin. McLovin's never existed because that's a made up dumb f!@#$%& fairy tale name.

Warmest Regards,

P.S. If you thought this was going to be about McDonald's, I apologize for the confusion.